A Liberal Christian Pastor's Guide to the Holidays

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A Liberal Christian Pastor's Guide to the Holidays

· Christmas,Musings

Lately, I’ve been thinking that we’ve been making up Christmas Carols. This is the one the facebook posts of so many people seem to sing to me:

Deck the halls,
Head to the malls,
Spend without care,
For presents to share
Give to groups that hate
To make yourself feel great
Do more more and more
Spend more more and more
And don’t forget that freaking elf
Spying from upon the shelf
It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
Yay Christmas.

I’m kidding—kind of. But only kind of.

Deck the halls:

Yes, decorating for Christmas is a great and wonderful tradition. I love it, and if you know me at all, you know that I love my trees and ornaments and nativities. But I don’t love them at the expense of my health or well-being. But, at the risk of sounding like I’m preaching—are you serious people? If you’re decorating for ANYONE besides yourself and your family take a step back already! Decorating is not a competition sport. We don’t need to outdo our neighbors or go into debt to the electric company! One of my favorite advent songs, “People Look east” by Eleanor Farjeon states it best:

People, look east. The time is near
Of the crowning of the year
Make your house fair as you are able,
Trim the hearth and set the table.
People, look east and sing today:
Love, the guest, is on the way.

Make your house as fair AS YOU ARE ABLE—do what you can. This year, I can’t. I can’t find my Christmas decorations in the mess that is my storage unit (my baby Jesuses are somewhere in there with my missing sweaters and my motorcycle boots). I don’t have time. I don’t have space (400 square feet, y’all). So, I’m going to do what I can—that’s probably going to be the one nativity set that’s near the front and something in the “yard.”

“Head to the malls,
Spend without care,
For presents to share”

Yes. I get it. Since those wise-ones brought gifts to the baby Jesus, we’ve been inclined to buy gifts for each other. It’s a thing we do. And it is a lovely thing indeed. I don’t mind getting gifts, and I LOVE giving them. But can we take it down a notch? The average person says they plan to spend $882 on gifts this year (which is down from its peak of $1052 in 2001) Even if you make a lot of money, that’s a lot of money. Seriously. That’s a few car payments, a month’s rent or mortgage (unless you live in California), or a few student loan payments. Yes, buy gifts! I’m not saying not to. I’m just saying that a few carefully, personally chosen (or crafted) gifts carry greater meaning than a bunch of stuff.

Maybe we should take our cue from the little drummer boy?

“Baby Jesus…
I am a poor boy too…
I have no gift to bring…
That’s fit to give a king…
Shall I play for you?”

So yeah, a drum solo from a small child might not be the best gift you’ve ever gotten, but then again—if it’s your toddler niece or nephew banging on the carefully chosen drum set you’ve given—it might just be the best gift ever.

“Give to groups that hate
To make yourself feel great”

And while we’re doing all this giving, can we please be careful with where we spend our money? Can we PLEASE stop funding organizations and companies that do bad things? Please?

For example: Operation Christmas Child. This organization funds anti LGBTQ activities, supports the ministries of the “racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic and otherwise bigoted” Franklin Graham. And beyond that, it gives children things they do not actually need all while pushing the white, conservative “Christian” agenda on the children who get these boxes, “In every country where it is legal, Operation Christmas Child adds tracts and religious material promoting their narrow theological perspective—that all those who do not believe as they do will be eternally, consciously tormented in hell forever by God.” How about donating to an organization such as Oxfam or Heifer International instead please?

And don’t even get me started on those darn red kettles. The Salvation army has a history of discrimination against LGBTQ folks, and while they’ve tried really hard to convince us otherwise, documentation leaked in October of 2014 would suggest otherwise. Again, there are much more worthy organizations that deserve your money. And if you want to support the LGBTQ community, may I suggest the Trevor Project?

And if we're shopping? Ugh. Let’s talk about for a minute. Can we please do like 47 seconds of research to make sure the places getting our money do good stuff in the world? Please?

“Do more more and more
Spend more more and more”

This seems to go without saying. We have over-spent and over-programmed ourselves to the extent that December is a nightmare of comings and goings and buyings and givings and cookings and bakings and and and….

What’s the point of even putting up the tree if you aren’t going to be home for 3 consecutive minutes to possibly enjoy it?

Why spend hundreds of dollars on gifts if you don’t have the time to watch them be opened and enjoyed?

I say this all as my calendar is already starting to fill up with holiday obligations. And that’s what they are—the required work activities that we go to so we can keep our employers happy and therefore we get to keep our jobs (which is crappy by the way, send me a gift certificate for dinner that my spouse and I can enjoy sometime in January or February please). No one wants to be forced to celebrate—especially if you dislike (but are very thankful for) your job.

Let’s do less and spend MORE time with each other, please?

One of my favorite Amy Grant songs says,

“Come and gather around at the table
In the spirit of family and friends
And we’ll all join hands and remember this moment
Til the season comes ‘round again”

It’s about the moments, folks. It really is. And these are the moments we don’t get back. The first Christmas with a new baby, a new spouse, a new family. The last Christmas with a parent, a grandparent, a dear friend. That $38.42 sweater you got on black Friday will be long forgotten, but those moments… that’s what we need more of.

“And don’t forget that freaking elf
Spying from upon the shelf”

I have so many issues with this silly little elf—the least of which is the creepy factor. There’s also the mom-wars that happen over this thing’s hijinks and the absolute terrifying “big brother” correlations, “It sounds humorous, but we argue that if a kid is okay with this bureaucratic elf spying on them in their home, it normalizes the idea of surveillance and in the future restrictions on our privacy might be more easily accepted.” I’m also uncomfortable with “Stalker Santa” (He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake” and also uncomfortable with a God that sits up in the sky zapping lightning bolts down at people who misbehave. Can we take some of the judgment of this whole mess please?

We have enough fear in this world, do we have to bring it into our holiday?
And yet, O Little Town of Bethlehem reminds us

“Yet in thy dark streets shineth
The everlasting light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Are met in thee tonight”

This is not a time for fear. This is a time for joy, kindness, and peace! If you are bound and determined to have some elf-action in your house- would you possibly consider a Kindness Elf instead? An Elf that encourages acts of selflessness rather than bringing mess and havoc? Yeah, I can live with that one. And let’s leave Stalker-claus out of it. I’m all about the jolly red cheeked guy sharing love and joy with the world’s children. But—can we do so without judgment and fear? Please? Our kids face enough of that every day in their schools. Home should be a safe place!

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
Yay Christmas.”

Actually, it is the most wonderful time of the year. And when approached with a healthy dose of reality and a bit of restraint, we’ll all live through it and possibly even enjoy it!

And when I can’t remember, I read this carol over and over again:

I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day, by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

Till ringing, singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men.”

“2015 Christmas Gift Spending Plans Up Slightly.” American Research Group, INC, November 21, 2015. http://americanresearchgroup.com/holiday/.

“Here’s The Internal Document The Salvation Army Doesn’t Want You To See.” Queerty. Accessed November 30, 2015. Here’s The Internal Document The Salvation Army Doesn’t Want You To See.

Holley, Peter. “The Elf on the Shelf Is Preparing Your Child to Live in a Future Police State, Professor Warns - The Washington Post.” Accessed November 30, 2015. https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/arts-and-entertainment/wp/2014/12/16/the-elf-on-the-shelf-is-preparing-your-child-to-live-in-a-future-police-state-professor-says/?tid=sm_fb.

Joy, Emily. “7 Reasons Not to Participate in Operation Christmas Child This Year.” Emily Joy Poetry. Accessed November 30, 2015. http://emilyjoypoetry.com/7-reasons-not-to-participate-in-operation-christmas-child-this-year.

“Kindness Elves: An Alternative Elf on the Shelf Tradition - The Imagination Tree.” Accessed November 30, 2015. http://theimaginationtree.com/2013/11/alternative-elf-on-shelf-tradition-kindness-elf-kindness-elves.html.