It’s funny to think back on the moments and questions that start a relationship, but when I asked Jen and Rob how they met, they both pointed to the exact same moment in time. Jen’s friend Becky had gone on a date with a guy from e-harmony, and it turns out the guy lived just down the street from her. They were not, as you might guess, a match made in heaven, but a year later, Becky decided that Rob would be perfect for her friend Jen.
Internet hijinks ensued- tracking down an old Myspace account, an AOL account, and a random yahoo email- all were techniques used to try to find the guy that lived just down the street. You know- right down the road where a note could be left on a car, or a chance encounter could happen on a sidewalk. No- internet subterfuge was the much better plan. And thus a cryptic message danced across the interwebs…
Are you single and are you open-minded?
Imagine receiving this message randomly from someone you had dated exactly once! Imagine if this singular question would lead you to an online chat, a phone call, or a first date. But this question isn't what actually sealed the deal- nor was it the phone calls or the dinner.
It was, in fact, a leather trench coat- long, black, supple leather. This is the kind of coat you’d expect from a supervillain or a character from the matrix. It’s a bit mysterious. It’s a bit menacing. It was exactly the kind of thing that Jen would be interested in…and perhaps why Becky wanted to be sure Rob was open-minded. Who knows? But it was the leather jacket that sealed the deal for Jen.
Now, if you know me at all, you know I know a few things about caring for leather. So this notion of a leather jacket as the foundation for a relationship got me thinking. See, if you don’t condition and care for leather, it grows brittle. It stops being protective. It can fall apart at the seams. Now if that’s not a perfect metaphor for marriage, I don’t know what is. A marriage takes care and conditioning or it too will fall apart at the seam. It takes communication and compromise. It takes passion and fun. It takes creativity and exploration. It takes WORK.
And of course, marriage comes with a promise to love in sickness and in health, and so your health matters to each other and to your relationship. I’m not just talking about physical health, but rather about the health of your relationship and your home. True marriage is more than the joining of two persons; it is the union of two hearts. It lives on the love you give each other and never grows old, but thrives on the joy of each new day. Marriage is love. May you always be able to talk things over, confide in each other, laugh with each other, enjoy life together, and share moments of quiet and peace, when the day is done. May you both enjoy lifetime of happiness and a home of warmth and understanding.
And may you never forget the love, care, and work you’ve already put into this relationship or the black leather coat that sealed the deal.